217
A sharp retort stopped the conversation. A Keeper appeared in the door and spoke to us. We were ordered to speak in the language our owners gave us. The language Rose had used was not acceptable.
After an apology from Rose the men said they were Keepers for the Administrators. The secrets of this world were known to them. I was a breeder and the other slaves were for my health. We should talk freely.
“Yes, sir,” I said gratefully and he turned away.
I watched them wander back to the table before I spoke again. My voice broke as I spoke to Rose, “I don’t know how to fix it. They are so upset with me.”
Rose’s beautiful eyes met mine and she nodded, encouraging me to continue. Fuji was engrossed in what she was doing on the pad. It seemed like it was just Rose and me in the room. One Keeper kept an eye on us through the open door, but he didn’t seem to be listening closely. It felt private.
“I wanted to hurt myself and I tried to hit the wall,” I whispered to Rose. “Then… and then I said it to them, I told them I didn’t want to live. It made them all angry with me.”
She wanted to know why I was thinking like that, so I told her. It had been the wrong thing to think about and I’d known that at the time. The situation just seemed so hopeless.
“My sons will leave me. My daughters won’t be able to see me. I will just create them until I am drained!” I wailed hugging a pillow.
Rose petted my head and whispered soothing words. As we sat, I found strange comfort in the fabric I was gripping. Bane’s scent was on the pillow, it was his and it smelled of him. I pulled it closer and cried harder.
“I’ve never met most of my Brothers,” Fuji announced suddenly. “Males of my species leave as soon as they can, before their male breeder eats them.”
The statement was not meant to be funny, but with my out of control emotions it made me giggle. Fuji just continued to work, completely unfazed. Rose met my eyes and she was trying desperately not to laugh.
“I don’t think Ciara’s Masters will eat her male young,” Rose said with confidence.
Fuji seemed to think it was a risk and continued to draw. Finally I lay back against the bed and curled into a ball. Rose stroked my arm and I spoke quietly to her.
“They don’t want to forgive me. I’ve made them so angry…” I whispered pulling Bane’s pillow closer to my chest.
Rose snuggled beside me and we lay there quietly cuddling for some time.Text property © Nôvel(D)ra/ma.Org.
“You are a slave,” Rose whispered. “I think it is harder for you because you are not treated as we are. It is the truth and you must accept it. A good slave accepts their owner’s plan. You must do that now.”
“But my children-” I started to say and Rose interrupted.
The children were not mine; they belonged to Nu-reeh. It wasn’t a choice.
“If they are killed or too weak to survive, I will be at fault. I brought them into this unprepared,” I cried.
“It is without value for you to concern yourself with that,” Rose said into my hair. “It is not a choice you can make. Your life is not your own and your children are not your own. Your owner will deal with them.”
I nodded and let silent tears fall. She was right. I could fight or acquiesce. The outcome would be the same. The only victims were my feelings on the matter.
“Do you wish to die?” Rose asked.
I thought for a moment and the answer was definitely ‘no’. Obviously I wanted out of this horrible situation, but that didn’t mean death. I wanted to live.
“No, I still want to survive,” I finally said.
“Good,” Rose praised, “now you must relax and accept your fate.”
Rose was defeated long before I arrived here and I knew that. I still had some will of my own, but it was being stripped from me. We were slaves, used at our owners discretion until we had no more to give. It was the outcome I had feared from the beginning.
We lay curled together on the bed for a long while. Neither of us spoke, the only sound in the room was Fuji’s working on the pad. Eventually my breathing evened out and I calmed some.
“Ciara,” Rose whispered after the tears had dried, “teach me to read.”
I sat up and Rose sat up with me. She looked really excited. Her eyes were shining, but she tried to maintain a calm demeanor.
Much to Fuji’s dismay we took the little pad back. I used it to begin teaching Rose the simplest pieces of the language. It was more difficult than when I learned, but of course she wasn’t bonded to a Warrior right now.
Fuji watched us with utter disinterest. She only occasionally interrupted to remind us we weren’t supposed to be doing this. I sighed and rolled my eyes.
“I like to teach and Rose likes to learn, Fuji. This is fun. I know it’s not what we’re supposed to be doing. Maybe we work some this afternoon, would that make you happy?” I asked feeling exasperated.
Damien’s voice surprised me so badly I dropped the pad on the bed.
“Is this what we left you to do?” he questioned stepping into the room.
My back touched the pole at the center of the bed and my eyes were wide. He just stood staring at me with his arms crossed.
“Well?” he asked stepping in farther.
“Yes… No, I’m not sure,” I finally answered.
He didn’t say anything and walked slowly toward the bed. Behind him I heard Rose and Fuji’s owners calling them to come and eat. I didn’t even glance at them, my eyes stayed on Damien.
The girls slipped off the bed and left. Damien continued to watch me with his arms folded across his chest. He looked contained, but I couldn’t tell much more than that.
I started to speak and he held a hand up to silence me, so I just stayed quiet.
Damien walked until is thighs were flush with the bed. He motioned me closer to him and I moved quickly toward him. I was stretching the leash on my neck tight, but it brought me within a handspan of him.
“You were a good girl this morning,” he praised suddenly reaching forward and releasing the strap around my neck. “If it helps with your project, I will ask Basin if his slave may learn the symbols. Would that make you happy?”
I nodded and smiled up at him. “Yes, it would help if she knew how to make the symbols. I enjoy teaching her, also.”
Damien smiled back at me and offered a hand to help me off the bed. I stood before him and had the sudden need to be close. Wrapping my arms around his waist I hugged him tight. He returned the affection, holding me for a moment. I felt his lips on my hair and knew he was kissing my head.
“Come and eat,” he said coaxing me out into the main room.
Rose and Fuji knelt at the table and took their meals from their owners’ fingers. I didn’t see a place for me to kneel. Damien guided me to a chair and sat me down. I looked up at him questioningly.
“Eat your midday meal, Ciara,” he said placing a bowl in front of me.
The other men made no sounds as Damien sat casually beside me.
The food in the bowl was good, mostly. It seemed to be fruit mixed with some sort of meat. The meat was chewy and oily, I did not like it at all.
It didn’t take Damien more than a moment to realize I was picking out what I liked. He took the bowl and fed me himself. He mixed the fruit and meat, making me eat it together. Begrudgingly, I admitted it was pretty good that way.
While we ate, he talked to Basin. Our daytime assignments would be easier if Rose understood the symbols. Damien requested I be allowed to teach Rose. After watching Rose for a moment, Basin agreed.
After lunch Damien pulled me into the closet with our clothes. He stripped off my night dress and picked out simple pieces of ornamentation for me. As he hooked the delicate metal clasps to my collar and around my waist, I looked at the locked weapons cupboard.
There was no way I was getting to the weapons in the apartment. The door was closed and appeared to be secured with a solid piece of metal. Damien noticed my attention and frowned.
“I was curious what the men did last night,” I said honestly. “There were things on my world you would have used, but I’ve never seen anything like that here.”