Chapter 40
Jennie Wilson POV
My entire body stiffened, the muscles in my throat tensing as I sensed what he intended on doing. He was hurting me so much. He was ripping my heart apart.
“Why are you back to insults then? Why aren’t you treating me like before? Why does it concern you with whom I be with and with whom I won’t?” I said as tear escaped from my eye
He was visibly shaking uncontrollably. His eyes so cold and pained, reminding me of the old, dark Vincent.
He pushed me releasing from his hold abruptly.
” So predictable” He said under his breath, his voice conveying pure hatred. ” A cheap slut always keep wh*ring around, no matter how much ever you treat her nicely. A wh*re is a wh*re after all…… I’d won’t be surprised if you threw yourself in my arms. ”
Silence fell upon me as a pure shock settled on my face. I reached the very bottom of humiliation, serving myself to him to break me all over again. How much more stupid could I get.
Ok. That’s enough……
” You’re such a hypocrite. You are a horrible jerk without a heart after all, making me all too faulty and obviously no respect for me. ” I clenched my fist, my anger erupting like a volcano.
” First thing you are no one to me nor I am to you, so drop it. Who the f*** are you judge me? ”
Vincent clenched his fist on his sides, clearly battling with a sudden flare of anger.
” Before pointing at my character look at yourself, who you are. Every time I expect worst from you since you bullied me! When you can’t win with words, you use violence. You build up so much insecurity and terror in me making me all too afraid to come out of my shell.”
Vincent suddenly grabbed my collar, only inches away from me, his animosity unfurled in waves from his terrifying eyes evoking dread.
” You really know how to provoke me. If I were you I wouldn’t mess with myself, because I am a f***ing psychopath remember? ” Vincent voiced cracked.
He released my collar pushing me with a distance, giving death glare ” Just go before I do something bad to you”
Vincent was breathing heavily, his arm shaking visibly.
” Since you mentioned forgiving and saving, we are even now.” He paused, his face almost teary. ” We are even now.”
” Never ever show your face again and I will never cross your path, it’s that simple. If not I will break you into pieces that it will be very painful recollecting yourself. Please go. LEAVE.”
He let go off me abruptly, stepping away from me. Giving a glance of hatred, he spun on his heel and stormed out of there.
It was ironic how I’d always wanted Vincent to leave me alone, let me live in peace, but when he was going I felt hurt and dejected.
My heart was breaking into pieces, each second bringing more pain and humiliation. My chest ached at the bitter reality.
I slid down to the floor crying heavily. I saw a foot come into my field of my vision. Hayden clenched his fist, looking at me, his eyes showing nothing but hurt.
” I mean nothing? My confession, my love is nothing to you?”
” Hayden I didn’t mea-”
” This is it? At the end you ended up choosing Vincent. You ended up choosing who doesn’t even care about you, who will give you nothing but tears.” Hayden shouted at me.
” Hay-”
” You know what…… f*** it. I am done here. Forget everything whatever I said.” He said clearly hurt. His words pierced through me, I didn’t wanted to hurt him. He threw a box away with a strength and started walking away abruptly.
” Hayden, please listen to me!” I ran after him but he was fast.
” Hay-” I fell hard on the ground tripping over, my legs and arms burned as my feet rushed over the concrete ground. Hayden was gone already.
The hot tears spilled from my eyes, and I wasn’t anymore aware of the surrounding, slowly drowning into old despair. I liked Hayden, I really did but it wasn’t love. I wasn’t ready for anything.
I cried and cried laying on the ground, drowning in sorrow.
Why does it happen only to me??
Why God why??
Vincent stayed true to his words. We were both invisible to each other. Whenever our paths crossed, he didn’t even look at me, let alone speak with me.
Actually, I rarely even saw him anymore, because he was almost never home and he skipped college a lot recently.
Whenever I went to Vincent’s house, he was never home, maybe he deliberately skipped coming home knowing I would come.
I’d noticed he would often come to college with bruises on his face, and I wondered if he was fighting a lot. He was getting worse day by day and it was bothering me a lot.
Hayden ignored me too, he never spoke a word to me after that, I couldn’t blame him since I deserved it the way I treated him.
Harper and Rose again dragged me to Vincent’s house, as usual he wasn’t there again. Emma and others were chatting but I decided to take a walk around garden.
I was strolling around the garden with my heavy heart, but I felt someone caught my upper arm in a steely grip and spun me around abruptly, my racing pulse went crazy.
” What the f*** did you do???”
Blake dashed me to the tree grabbing my neck tightly. ” I said to lessen his depression not increase it b*tch!!!”
He held my neck so tightly it hurt. A tear escaped from my eye drowning in hurt.
” He is getting gloomy day by day, never comes home properly, he is involving into dangerous fights and gangs, he talks back to us angrily. His mental health is going worse than ever! What the f*** did you do!!?”
New hot tear escaped out and I slid down in sorrow. I couldn’t hide it anymore. The hurt, and shame and anger invited more self-hatred and self-doubts.
I told the whole story to Blake crying out. “…… We exchanged some insults to each other and we ended up like this.”
Blake raked his head in frustration like a mad man. ” Didn’t I f***ing tell you to stay away from Hayden!” He shouted at me. ”
Oh come on!
I fumed up. ” Do you mean I have no freedom do my own things? You all are here to decide what should I do and what should I not in my life? You people are no right to order me what to do in my lif-”
” Shut up! Stop preaching I am not in a mood to listen your bickering.” Blake blurted out. ” I get it you have a life, at least you should have been careful with the words. Don’t you know he has cyclothymia?”
I winced at his words slicing me deep within. Mental disorders are the most dangerous than any other.
I finally realized I’d made a serious mistake. I didn’t choose my words wisely. I blurted out things making him feel less secure and extremely vulnerable.
” You know certain life events may increase your chances of developing cyclothymia, because of that he’s all messed up and developed that disorder.”
My heart lurched in my chest, bringing unbearable pain. I didn’t want him to suffer. Blake held my hand and started dragging me with him. ” Hey where are you taking me!?”
” Just solve yours and Vincent’s problem and misunderstanding in time, don’t drag it longer.”
” But he is not often seen and top of that he said never to talk to him. How am I going to convince him” I said as Blake dragged me with him.
Blake stopped suddenly making me dash on him by the sudden impact.
” You really think he wants to be left alone? No f***ing body wants to be alone. He needs you the most, when he is in the most vulnerable state, but all you do is ditch him.”
Something cold tugged at my stomach, my heart torn to more pieces by his words.
He dragged me to the entrance of the forest. Of course, how can I forget Vincent would be here, the forest……!Contentt bel0ngs to N0ve/lDrâ/ma.O(r)g!
Blake pushed me, almost like shooing me. He wavered his hand ” Vincent has entered the forest just half an ago. Go from here, I can’t come with you, as he will suspect something. Solve your issues, make him understand. Go”
Forest…….
” But Blake…… fo… forest……”
” Come on you won’t die, it’s man-made forest, it doesn’t contain any carnivore, there might be snakes…… just don’t panic it. I know you have gone to forest before too. Anyway Vincent will be there with you. If he gets to know I have plotted all this he will kill me with you too.”
My stomach spammed at the thought. A part of me-a huge, huge part-wanted to bolt away, but the other part made me focus on it.
Blake pushed me ” Your going to be fine…… just watch your mouth, I know only you can calm him, I don’t think he will hurt you…… maybe. Anyway Get going now.”
” No I don’t want to go!!” I shrieked revolting his push. Blake gave me a frustrated look, giving me death glare.
” Decide. You want to get killed by my hands or Vincent’s?”
” What……?”
” There may be 50% chance that you might not get killed by Vincent, but 200% sure you will be by my hand. I will make sure that you get the cruellest death. You clearly know me, what I can do.”
What.!!
I could never figure Blake out. He was too unpredictable and impulsive, and his actions could rather be inconsistent. One moment he was normal, the next he fumed with white-hot rage.
” What do you want now?” He hissed at me in his deadly voice. ” Come On Say It”
I quivered in fear “Vi…… Vincent……”
” Good. Get going now……” Blake pushed me to the forest.
Something told me this was a bad idea, but I had to do it because I might not be able to gather the courage later. I walked into the forest taking a last glance at Blake.
I was not afraid of forest, since it was still daylight and I could clearly see beautiful view and I knew the route now, I had my phone with me too. I just wished there are no snakes around.
All I was thinking of Vincent now. He was fighting his own demons, and I hurted him when he needed me the most. Cyclothymia was rare mood disorder. If left untreated, it can increase his, risk of developing bipolar disorder.
I learnt that Cyclothymia is just a mild stage, later he might develop bipolar I or bipolar II disorder later in life which is much more dangerous. I can’t let this happen to him.
What incident happened that he started developing this disorder?
I walked a few mile, crunching dry leaves as I walked. My pulse went crazy when my eyes found who I had been looking for.
Vincent was sitting on a tree, his layers of pain squeezed my heart, starting to unfold and disappear into nothing
Taking deep breath, I looked at Vincent. I had to pull myself together. I would be okay. I was falling apart now, but I would be better. I had to be.
Vincent hair was messed up, he looked like he had mental breakdown a few minutes ago, now he was calming himself sitting on the tree, sagging to the trunk.
My legs felt unsteady as they carried me to him. It was like I was walking straight into lion’s den, and I was clueless about what was waiting for me in the end.
” Vin…… cent” I called him shuttering, his back muscles suddenly turned rigid scaring me to death, but surprisingly he didn’t turn to face me.
” Vincent…… I…” My breath hitched, my racing pulse going crazy.
Suddenly he turned to face me, wearing a hostile expression. I saw the wounds on his face, the blood was tricking from above his brow, and lips. A dull throbbing pain spread through my chest.
Did he involve into a fight!?
” Did…… did you involve into a fight?”
Vincent clenched his fist, clearly battling with his emotions. He grew still his eyes snapping up looking at me.
” Its you again? “He hissed at me.” Didn’t I warn you to never cross my path? DIDN’T I F***ING TELL TO STAY AWAY FROM ME!”
Vincent shout made me flinch, and he stared taking threatening steps towards me.