Shattered Souls (Guardians of the Maiden Book 3)

Every facet of Dyna’s attention was on him. She was hardly aware of Lucenna and Noemi beside her, or of Zev and Rawn. She only saw him. Lightning flashed overhead, catching the silver of Cassiel’s eyes. He looked different within the backdrop of the castle as though it changed him. More ethereal. More striking. His clothing was sleek and elegant as his wings. Locks swept across his forehead and she had the urge to run her fingers through them. Every inch of her being begged to get closer. To touch him and feel the energy of their bond flow between them.

“Noemi, please excuse me with Lord Jophiel,” Cassiel said, his gaze never leaving hers. “I’m afraid Dynalya and I will not make it to dinner.”

After a pause, the air shifted around her, and the soft footsteps of everyone faded away. Once they were alone, Dyna took a breath and walked down the short steps into the garden, drawn to him by some unspoken beckoning.

Cassiel’s eyes followed her until she stopped five feet away from him. Afraid to get too close, and afraid of what he would say. His shield was down, and it would have been easy to read him if she dropped hers, but a part of her was still holding back.

A small frown pulled at his lips. He gently prodded her end of the bond, asking to feel her. She shook her head. She didn’t want him to see the ugliness inside.

“I heard…” she swallowed. “About you and Sarrai…”

His wings unfurled slowly, then he stepped toward her. “Dyna.” Her name on his lips was an acknowledgment, an apology, and a reverence. “You are right to feel slighted. I’m sorry you learned of that before I could speak to you.”

So it was true.

What was there to speak about if it was an order from his father? If Yoel learned of their bond, would he release Cassiel from the engagement?

“Tell me your thoughts.” His voice was low, strained. “What are you thinking?”

Burning rushed up her nose, and her eyes stung. She swallowed a couple times before she could speak. “I knew whatever happened when we arrived would be difficult … but this…it’s a lot.”

He reached for her, but his fingers curled into a fist and his hand dropped. “Do you wish…for me to release you?”

The question was a fist around her heart.

But that wasn’t his intention. He couldn’t feel anything from her right now, or perceive anything but the brokenness she couldn’t keep from her face. His question sounded brittle. Vulnerable. She sensed it hurt him to ask it, but this was his attempt to give her a choice—and the chance to fight for him. He would never force her to accept being his, and the burdens that came with their bond.

Dyna didn’t care about any of that. Her reason dwindled to simply feeling unworthy and having no right to protest the engagement.

“I know none of this is what we hoped for.” Cassiel took a step closer. “My sentencing is yet to be decided, but they mean to make me Lord of Hermon. The burden of being by my side would be heavier. Unkinder.”

Because they would not easily accept her as their Lady. They would scorn her and he knew it.

“I once told you I couldn’t release you from the bond,” he said softly. “But Dyna, if you tell me this isn’t what you want…then…”

He would release her.

Tears welled in her eyes. Never had she desired to be released. Not even when she learned their bond was created by accident. Every shred of her soul wanted this—him. But from the uncertainty of his expression, he didn’t want her to accept him simply because of their bond. Cassiel wanted her to choose to be his. To say it aloud. Because she wasn’t the only one with insecurities. Which only made her want to laugh at how silly it all was.

The first time she ever laid eyes on him she knew in her soul that her life would never be the same. That everything she knew about love and fate would change. It didn’t matter that she was human, and it didn’t matter that she was frightened of what the future may bring. Any risk was worth the mere chance that he could be her forever.

Dyna exhaled a sharp breath. “No.”

“No?”

“No, I don’t want to be released. No, I won’t be cast aside for another. No, I won’t let any person, or thing or law come between us. You belong to me and only me.”

Cassiel inhaled faintly, his mouth parting. “Could you repeat that? I don’t think I heard you clearly the first time.”

“You belong to—”

He surged forward, and his mouth crashed into hers. An electrifying current tingled through her lips on contact. She threw her arms around his neck, rising on her toes, melting into the devouring kiss. His body sagged against her with utter relief, because for once, nothing was keeping them apart. His hands roamed to her waist and up her back, pulling her tight against him.

“I cannot describe to you how much I desired to hear that,” Cassiel said when they finally stopped for air. He brushed her cheek. “And I can finally touch you.”

She smiled. “I passed through the Rising.”

“Thank Elyōn. It drove me mad to see you cry.” Cassiel gently pressed his mouth to the corner of her lashes, kissing away the last of her tears. “Every part of me missed touching you.” His mouth grazed her cheek to the shell of her ear. “To feel you. To taste your lips.” She shuddered and her skin pebbled at his breath coasting over her neck. Cassiel’s hands traveled down her spine and her heart sped at how close their bodies were pressed together.

“The bond,” he begged on her lips. “Drop the shield. Let me in.”

She sensed it left a big gaping void in his chest. A wall that kept away her soul, her presence, her voice. He couldn’t stand being apart from her in that way, not when it reminded him too much of they time they were apart.

Inhaling a shaky breath, Dyna dropped her shield. All of her self-doubts and insecurities, her guilt for what she had done, unleashed every chaotic feeling in their raw force, and he winced. The wind picked up and blew against them and a soft mist fell.

Cassiel shook his head as if it made no sense to him. “Did you truly believe after all that we have been through, that I would not choose you?”

It took her a moment to confess. “A hidden part of me feared that I didn’t fit by your side, but today…when you were on your knees…” She closed her eyes. “I couldn’t let them hurt you. I’m sorry I killed them. I’m so sorry. But I couldn’t let go.”

He looked at her as if nothing else existed at that moment. “Should our positions have been reversed, I would have done the same without a second thought. That day beneath the willow, I did not mean perhaps we should attempt marriage, or that I’m not sure of how I felt. I certainly did not mean I would attempt it with another if you denied me. All that I am is bound to you.”

She had to remind herself to breathe because he had a way of making her stop.

Cassiel gathered her locks tousling in the wind and curled them over his fingers, bringing them to his lips. It was done in such a reverent way it made her heart slow. “At haor sheli…that is who you are to me. It means ‘you are my light’, referring to the first rays of the sunrise as it spreads across the horizon, fading all that was dark away. Dynalya, you are my dawn. Without you, there is no sun.”

Her face crumbled as the tears she couldn’t hold back spilled down her face. He held her to him, his wings gently enveloping her in warmth as if she was treasured. Loved.

That was what he was telling her in so many words.

“I expected our lives together would hold its challenges,” he murmured. “That it would require many things I was not prepared for. But what I am prepared for is to fight for it because I want a life with you. I choose you. I chose you from the moment you smiled at me. Never should you ever doubt that.”

She buried her face in his chest. “Forgive me. I needed to hear it.”Còntens bel0ngs to Nô(v)elDr/a/ma.Org

“Stupid human.” He sighed. “I regret not speaking plainly from the onset. I shall do so now.” He lifted her chin so she looked at him. His thumb lightly caressed her cheek, tracing her jaw. “Lev sheli, I was yours long before I ever realized it, and yours I will remain. Ani ohev otach.”

She didn’t need to understand his ardent words to know what he had confessed. The distance between them vanished as he drew her to him, his lips taking hers. His tender kiss worshiped every part of her mouth. Heat stroked down her spine, spreading in her chest. Whatever happened from here on out, or the hardships they faced, he was hers and nothing, absolutely nothing would ever change that.